Doubt Dungeon

Jewel of Ramstone is with Totally Entwined Group . So what should I do while awaiting edits? Why, keep writing of course!

I'm currently working on the  second book in the Medieval Quest Series and decided to fetch a bit of feedback before moving on with the story. I attached a few chapters to an email addressed to my beta readers. Feeling great about accomplishing that task without wandering to facebook,  I grinned and I hit the send button.

 My fist finds my forehead every single time I hit send. 

  I wonder why?

What did I just do?

 I'm satisfied with the storytelling, setting and characters. I truly believe I fleshed out their quirks, weaknesses and strengths. The quest is a good one. Plot twists? Yep, they're there too.

Why then, do I fist my head after I hit the send button? I took a lot of time thinking about this instead of meeting my daily writing goal. Here's what I came up with:

I want every reader

To love and hate

As they travel through

The medieval gate

I want each character

To be real in their eyes

 And rejoice in lives spared

Or weep when one dies

I must transport readers

To  a new life which transcends

And settle them softly

When the story ends.

At the risk of completely overusing the word want...

 I want to accomplish everything in that off-rhythm-rhyme. However, doubt slithers into my mind and sends me to the worry dungeon. That is why my fist finds my forehead. I'm trying to pound the doubt out. Apparently, it's embedded pretty deep.

 But I'm a writer, dammit. And I will learn from feedback, edits and reviews. I will continue to polish my craft. And most important, I will give my reader an experience.. 

I think every writer spends  a little time in the dungeon. 

I need to jump over the hurdles of doubt and worry. Does everyone feel this way? Oh gosh, there I go wondering about stuff again. I better sign off before I write another poem.

Female Image by David Castillo Dominici at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Dungeon Image by pakorn at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Cover Reveal

No words needed. The cover art by Emmy Ellis says it all. 

Flat Tire Inflated!

Here's a little update from the weary author on the road to starting over.

I was happily traveling along the road of a published author...wind traveling through my hair...dreaming up plots for my next book. My characters rode in the backseat, encouraging my ideas. Sometimes a new character would hitch a ride, chattering in the passenger seat, convincing me why they'd enrich the story. 

Then I got a flat tire and hobbled on the rim until the road stopped. Yep. I hit a dead end, dark forests on each side. And my rim was as damaged as my spirit.

But I'm a stubborn soul. I climbed out of the vehicle, motioned for my characters to follow, and traipsed through the scary woods, manuscripts in hand.

 We didn't cross any wolves or gingerbread houses, despite my character, Ruby, insisting she wear a red cloak. We did come across a perfect home though.

.

 I am happy to announce my novel, Jewel of Ramstone, was accepted by Totally Bound Group. (Part of Totally Bound Publishing)

I'm eagerly awaiting edits.  Waiting is hard for me, so in the meantime, I'm continuing the Medieval Quest series. One of my favorite secondary characters from Jewel of Ramstone gets to tell his story in this book.

I've got a slew of work to keep me busy, as I tend to have more than one (or five) works in progress.

 My diverse characters need a place to exist after all:

A contemporary romance about a paralyzed woman rebuilding her life.

A fantasy romance about a human in love with an alien.

Another fantasy about a lost soul with a broken wing and spirit who crashes into a Christmas forest.

I'm revamping the three books in the Magic Stone Series.

I'm also co-authoring yet another project. Woman's fiction surrounding the hi-jinxs between twin sisters while they attempt to save a bed and breakfast from foreclosing.

In my spare time I write story ideas on paper towels while cooking dinner. 

My Way

Many times in life, things happen swiftly, without warning. There isn't a choice in the matter. Things spin out of our control. However, the outcome in these matters depends solely on the receiver.

Yeah, this is what I tell myself when life throws bricks at me. Do I believe my pep talk? Do I think I will survive the setback? Definitively.

I was born stubborn. (Ask anyone in my family.) As a  kid, a tenacious attitude was not a quality. Nor was it accepted. I spent most of my youth grounded. I didn't know how to curb the penchant to do things my way. I did not strive to be obstinate. It was simply the little person I was.

As an adult, I continued to embrace that stubborn spirit, but I learned where to apply it. In writing, I'm never stubborn when it comes to edits. I always learn from them. In relationships, I've tweaked stubborn into compromise. In many areas of life, it is unnecessary, or even detrimental to march the road of stubborn warfare.

However, in the aspect of life punching me in the gut,  I point down that road and shout a battle cry  I refuse to allow any hardship to beat me to the ground. Like anyone, life's punches hurt. They tend to knock wind out of hope. I'm affected like anyone else. I allow tears to travel down the road to self-pity land. (Or a waterfall to hard rocks when it comes to Autism affecting ones I love…but that's another story.)

A dollop of stubbornness and an army of courage sure come in handy in times of adversity. I wallow in the pity land for a bit, and then I move on. I persevere.

Stubborn can be a good thing, and I'm glad I was born with that quality. 

photo by Stuart Miles@freedigitalphotos.com

Late Night With a Caffeine Infused Writer.

 Persevere I said. It will be okay, I said.

But it doesn't feel okay. Not all the time anyway.

Have you ever started over? It not easy, is it?

(cuss word deleted)

I try to persevere in this journey back into publication. Usually I do well, but sometimes....ugh.

Well, it's done. Or it's just started. I suppose it's all in how I view it.

I've gathered my manuscript, synopses, and even updated my author bio. After researching many publishers, I sent submissions to a few. Jewel of Ramstone, needs the perfect home. Of course, all my books need a home, but I must admit Jewel of Ramstone is my favorite.

Then I waited.

Me: CHECKING EMAIL SEVERAL TIMES A DAY

  Usually I write while I wait, but I found myself coloring. Even though it was an "adult" coloring book, I put all my creativity in that, instead of working on the second book of the Medieval Quest Series. I mean, a secondary character refused to rest when Jewel of Ramstone ended. Who am I to argue with a handsome knight? Well, I was doing well with book two, and said knight was very pleased.

Before the bridge on my road to publication exploded.

I didn't know what was wrong with me. I always want to write. But damn, I sure could color pretty pictures, right?

Then the rejections began. But as many writer friends said, it is just a rejection. Keep at it. And I did/
I know it isn't my writing they are rejecting. There are a myriad of reasons publishers reject a manuscript. I'm not going to go into them, because…well, I'm supposed to be writing about perseverance.

As usual, I go around the long way to get to it.

I hope you aren't skimming

Okay this is random, but damn.

Back to the inspiration of this post.

PERSEVERANCE

You know what helps me persevere? Fellow authors.

They know the hours spent tapping away at the keyboard while the night turns to day.

They feel what I feel. Totally understand the ups and downs of the journey to publication...and beyond. 

They know the heartbreak of watching numerous works simply vanish when a publisher closes their doors.

Though authors may be going through all this, we are connected--like a single soul. 

I know, dramatic right?

Well, hell, I'm a writer. I love drama. 

And so, I'd like to dedicate this late-night-coffee-infuse-blathering post to my fellow writers:






I FEEL YOUR LOVE. I SEE YOU REACHING OUT, AND PULLING ME IN EVEN THOUGH I KNOW YOU ARE GOING THROUGH THE SAME THING.


Writer or not, words cannot convey the depth of my gratitude.

I am there for you as well.
Our community of writers, misfits, artists---whatever name society wants to put on us--we are strong.


WE will get there again. And we will celebrate with each success.

Poking My Feet Out of the Window

My publisher closed their doors, and I decided to open a window and climb out instead of waiting for another door to open. Was I upset? Yes. However, after my emotions face-planted me onto the couch and I used up my box of tissues and a roll of paper towels, I jutted my chin. Yep. Nothing, including all my books flying off of the shelves--and not in a good way--will not slay my determination.

When I started blogging, I shared my road to publication. It looks like it's time to do that again, huh?

Six books published, and now six looking for a home...yeah, another journey.

Recently, I submitted Jewel of Ramstone to a publisher. I gathered everything I needed.

My author bio was dated, the query and the synopsis in need of an update. 

Wow, I forgot how hard it was to write a query and synopsis! Not to mention talking about myself in a bio. I decided to embrace who I am, convey my love of writing and let my heart lead the query. The synopsis? Yeah, those give me hives, but I did it! Author bios come a bit easier, and I hope I got "me" across to the publisher. 

I'm keeping my nails on the keyboard, instead of of chewing them to a nub. My next book is in progress. Meanwhile, I'll check my email for  a contract...or (gulp) rejection.

Either way, I will continue on my quest--back into publication.

Left Me Breathless...

 "Breathless Press has decided to close its doors after a long year of declining sales...."

That is about all I could read before my eyes filled. Before my heart broke. Before I was left breathless.

This saddens me, and leaves me without a publisher. I had six books with Breathless Press. My first one in was published in 2009 and the last one just a few months ago.

However, unlike many troubled small publishing houses, Breathless Press did not leave authors high and dry. They closed their doors softly...slowly...and with a heads up. My publisher--well, former publisher--kept everyone updated. Then, when options were exhausted, they closed before they went broke.  This means every author, editor, cover artist and marketer gets paid.

 Too many times I've read about independent publishers closing with no notice, leaving the authors wondering how to get their right backs and collect owed royalties. Not my publisher. Breathless Press was a company full of honest, hardworking and amazing people. People who were shoved out of the publishing world by economic downfalls. Ouch.

Today I filled out the form to revert rights to me.  Damn. Yes, there were tears, and they fell hard and fast. Then, with my sister's words echoing in my mind, I swiped a tissue over my eyes and took a shaky breath. I decided to look for that door she stated would open when Breathless Press closed theirs.
 I'm still looking.
I think I need glasses. Preferably rose colored ones...

Okay time to buck up. It's a new venture. It's only been a few hours since I heard the final click of the door closing, but  though I am left out in the cold, dark world without those rose colored glasses, I refuse to give up.

I'm going to make my own path, fulfill my dreams and bring my characters to life again.